Not Again... - Lauren

And now, to top it off, I got a message from Amanda. It's like... I have great days for a while, then all of a sudden everything happens in one day. >.>
Just watch though, tomorrow it'll be Anysa with my luck. >:/
Cuz it's the three people I haven't spoken to and had no plan to, and honestly I don't think I can forgive despite how hard it is for me to be angry and reject them trying to be friends... I honestly don't know that I can forget what they did. Kira and I didn't even think of being 'friends' for a year and The reason we stopped didn't even involve me, but my best friend. I just... I wish I could be friends with them again. I do. But...

But I just... I look at Amanda and I remember a 'friend' who left me alone in the forest to go screw my brother. A 'friend' who has fed me lies almost since we met. A 'friend' who stole my best friend away to another room when me and Audrey slept to drink each others blood.
I look at Lyn and I see the angry violent person she uses to cover the deep, sweet girl inside. The one she refuses to let anyone see. I see the one who dated and threw away guys who may've loved her like they were nothing. I see the girl who stole my brother away for doing god knows what while I slept, and I woke up to find them sleeping on my floor cuddled up together. I see the girl Who I practically didn't exist to while she was with my brother.
I look at Anysa and I see feigned pregnancies, I see lies and cheating, I see Marcus's text after he found out about Jim and Anysa while they were dating. I see her and Amanda making out in the hallway. I just...
I don't think I can get past that... I really don't.

I don't want to be the one to give up on people... I really don't. That's the last one I wanted to be. But these aren't healthy people, and being around them causes me so much pain and stress. I'm just now feeling well, I don't need their shit too... I just can't do it... >.>


But i'll get through it, I always do. I'm just frustrated, I'll be fine in the end.It just sucks for now.