When I get all stressed, music is absolutely my best stress reliever.
It's even better when no one's home and I can blast my music at obnoxious volumes and sing at the top of my lungs until my voice breaks
Today I even added in dancing around like a complete idiot.
I feel great. :D
Showing posts with label stress. Show all posts
Showing posts with label stress. Show all posts
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
my second post today-B R I A N NA
so obviously there's a lot on my mind fer this to be my second post today.
things have gotten better since this morning,
and then not so much
Mia's home, and doing fine.
i mean she just lays next to me all day
its really cute she hasn't left my side all day..
until now.
but still.
The vet said she just needs rest
which is understandable
Bella makes her run around to muchh
ha.
My house has been pretty stressful lately..
or maybe its just me.
i feel like lately,
ive been getting yelled at more than usual,
for things that arent my fault
like
me and my mom just arent seeing eye to eye
not that we ever do
just lately its harder getting along
nd it sucks cause my brothers always in the middle of everything
he's 11 i hate giving him so much pressure
but its like hes the one i run to
i know i have Lexi, Nilsa, Shelby, Haley, and Mileena
behind me 100% but its just easier to go to my brother
and when i tell anyone else whats wrong with me
i feel like im asking fer their pity
like if i tell Isaac or Martin small things
like my dad, ive never gone into detail with either one of them,
about that
not that i dont want to, just simply
that i dont want them feeling bad for me
my girl friends i dont really mind because well..
its easier talking to girls
and i dun know.
i realized i dont tell guys about me.
i tel them simply whats on the surface..
such as, i love my brown eyes
but ive never told them that i had a SLIGHT pill
problem that ended as soon as i took the last one in the bottle
its just easier keeping it to myself and my girls
i mean i trust Martin with things like that
but i dun know i feel that if he knew things like that
about me, hed feel like he needs to take care of me,
and same with Isaac..
...
you know its funny.
both of them did the same thing when i brought up my dad once
isaac said "you know thats the first time ive heard you talk about him, whys that"
martin said "your dad, i have a question about him, why dont you talk about him?"
i love how niether of them asked, until i brought it up.
it made it kinda easier to tell them,
like now its because theyre curious
not because they want a sob story
make sense?
but anyways
so recently ive been debating weather to wait fer martin or not
nd just now,
that ive had time to let me think
and think about the things i miss
and how much he means to me
i know that im not gonna pass up the chance
to keep him in my life
weather it be as my boyfriend,
or simply just a best friend that i can go to
when i need to.
hes a great guy,
he has flaws and
he means so much to me.
like i said i dont even care if we jsut stay friends
ive realized that i dont need a boyfriend,
theyre nice to have,
but theyre not needed.
i mean duh ill do what ever it takes to be with him,
but i mean things happen fer a reason and hey,
ive learned my lesson :)
so point is,
I'll make an exception and wait.
things have gotten better since this morning,
and then not so much
Mia's home, and doing fine.
i mean she just lays next to me all day
its really cute she hasn't left my side all day..
until now.
but still.
The vet said she just needs rest
which is understandable
Bella makes her run around to muchh
ha.
My house has been pretty stressful lately..
or maybe its just me.
i feel like lately,
ive been getting yelled at more than usual,
for things that arent my fault
like
me and my mom just arent seeing eye to eye
not that we ever do
just lately its harder getting along
nd it sucks cause my brothers always in the middle of everything
he's 11 i hate giving him so much pressure
but its like hes the one i run to
i know i have Lexi, Nilsa, Shelby, Haley, and Mileena
behind me 100% but its just easier to go to my brother
and when i tell anyone else whats wrong with me
i feel like im asking fer their pity
like if i tell Isaac or Martin small things
like my dad, ive never gone into detail with either one of them,
about that
not that i dont want to, just simply
that i dont want them feeling bad for me
my girl friends i dont really mind because well..
its easier talking to girls
and i dun know.
i realized i dont tell guys about me.
i tel them simply whats on the surface..
such as, i love my brown eyes
but ive never told them that i had a SLIGHT pill
problem that ended as soon as i took the last one in the bottle
its just easier keeping it to myself and my girls
i mean i trust Martin with things like that
but i dun know i feel that if he knew things like that
about me, hed feel like he needs to take care of me,
and same with Isaac..
...
you know its funny.
both of them did the same thing when i brought up my dad once
isaac said "you know thats the first time ive heard you talk about him, whys that"
martin said "your dad, i have a question about him, why dont you talk about him?"
i love how niether of them asked, until i brought it up.
it made it kinda easier to tell them,
like now its because theyre curious
not because they want a sob story
make sense?
but anyways
so recently ive been debating weather to wait fer martin or not
nd just now,
that ive had time to let me think
and think about the things i miss
and how much he means to me
i know that im not gonna pass up the chance
to keep him in my life
weather it be as my boyfriend,
or simply just a best friend that i can go to
when i need to.
hes a great guy,
he has flaws and
he means so much to me.
like i said i dont even care if we jsut stay friends
ive realized that i dont need a boyfriend,
theyre nice to have,
but theyre not needed.
i mean duh ill do what ever it takes to be with him,
but i mean things happen fer a reason and hey,
ive learned my lesson :)
so point is,
I'll make an exception and wait.
Thursday, June 10, 2010
My Summer - Lauren
My summer's been interesting. Thursday before we got out of school i went on an adventure in the park with Gerda Karen Stephanie and Jenny, Saturday was Graduation, I went with Choir and sang the nation anthem, I hung out with all my amazing choir friends before, it was awesome. my choir friends are the best. XD I can't wait for Acapella next year. And I cried, a really good friend i've known forever and the guy i like were graduating. Sunday Jenny had a pool party only attended by Me, Kristina, and Paul. I had briefly met Kristina before, but hadn't talked to her much and never met Paul, Kristina hadn't either, but we all got along really well. Then I did absolutely nothing for an entire week but hang out with my family and watch farscape, and i was BORED OUT OF MY MIND. then yesterday Kristina Paul and I got together at Kristina's house and hung out, I found out I suck really bad at first person shooter video games (Halo and Gears of war at least), we went for a walk, just hung out. Then they got into a cotton candy fight. It was a little odd because I get the feeling they like eachother, but haven't necessarily noticed it yet. I felt a bit like the third wheel (a feeling i'm getting tired of feeling). Then today we were all supposed to hang out again, but Montanna kidnapped me to go and hang out with her and Argenis, we went on an adventure to marble falls and went berry picking. XD then we made pocket pies with them. It was yummy. Apperantly Gerda and Dylan showed up at my house while i was out to see if i wanted to go get smoothies with them (which is awesome because Dylan's nickname is Smoothie) but i was at Montanna's house baking. >< The only day i'm busy, everyone wants to see me. Oy.
Things at home have been weird, we're completely broke and it's stressing everyone out to a major level, I have been trying to get out of the house as much as possible. But it doesn't work so well. ><
My best friend (who lives in Louisiana) is going into the hospital tomorrow for surgery on her knee, yet again (She broke it once and it never healed right, now about every six months or less it acts up again and they have to go in and fix it), and that's got me nervous as all hell. I wish I could be there for her more than anything. When we were little, every time she'd get sick I'd bake her cookies and walk them down to her house, one time through a thunder storm. I was always there when she needed me, when she was sick, and she for me, but now... It's like I don't even know until After, and I hate it. I miss her so much. I haven't seen her since last summer. We're both broke so we don't think we can get anywhere. It sucks so much, I wish more than anything else I could be with her when she wakes up from her surgery. I really, really do. I don't know what I'd do without her, She's my everything.
The guy I like is moving this summer, leaving in august, but while as a friend I'm bothered that he's leaving, I'm ok with the 'just friends' pact we talked out. Since he's leaving and such. I told him I liked him, he had indirectly told me he did before when we went on the blind date montanna set up with 'someone who likes me' (her words), but we're staying just friends. I think I'm ok with it, I mean... There are a couple of things about him that bug me. He's catholic, which comes with a mess of stuff including a deep distaste for gays, and considering I'm an athiest and my best friend is a lesbian... I'm not so ok with that. and he uses the word Nigga a lot, jokingly, but it's weird. I think I'm ok with everything. Stressed out in general, but ok. =)
Things at home have been weird, we're completely broke and it's stressing everyone out to a major level, I have been trying to get out of the house as much as possible. But it doesn't work so well. ><
My best friend (who lives in Louisiana) is going into the hospital tomorrow for surgery on her knee, yet again (She broke it once and it never healed right, now about every six months or less it acts up again and they have to go in and fix it), and that's got me nervous as all hell. I wish I could be there for her more than anything. When we were little, every time she'd get sick I'd bake her cookies and walk them down to her house, one time through a thunder storm. I was always there when she needed me, when she was sick, and she for me, but now... It's like I don't even know until After, and I hate it. I miss her so much. I haven't seen her since last summer. We're both broke so we don't think we can get anywhere. It sucks so much, I wish more than anything else I could be with her when she wakes up from her surgery. I really, really do. I don't know what I'd do without her, She's my everything.
The guy I like is moving this summer, leaving in august, but while as a friend I'm bothered that he's leaving, I'm ok with the 'just friends' pact we talked out. Since he's leaving and such. I told him I liked him, he had indirectly told me he did before when we went on the blind date montanna set up with 'someone who likes me' (her words), but we're staying just friends. I think I'm ok with it, I mean... There are a couple of things about him that bug me. He's catholic, which comes with a mess of stuff including a deep distaste for gays, and considering I'm an athiest and my best friend is a lesbian... I'm not so ok with that. and he uses the word Nigga a lot, jokingly, but it's weird. I think I'm ok with everything. Stressed out in general, but ok. =)
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